I’ve spent my life thinking but not fully convinced
that no one really likes me
not even God, who it is said loves everyone
And I’ve often been fairly convinced
that my mom didn’t love me
though deep down I know she did
It’s not true, yet this persistent thought
has colored much of what I do
and what I don’t do
How long did I desire to be
a writer, but didn’t write
for anyone else to read
I’ve hidden away pages of prose and poetry
thoughts and feelings
that I now know others could relate to
How many opportunities to bless others
have I neglected because I undervalued
my own contribution to this world
I know I am loved
I am beloved by God
I am cherished by family
Nonetheless, even now sometimes
I think nobody really likes me
not even God
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The NaPoWriMo prompt for today is to write a poem with a line you are afraid to write. There are a few in this poem. I am afraid for others to know my doubt and fears. But this was good practice for writing my memoir, because that thing is going to include a lot of lines I’m afraid to write.